Mary Foley - 8th Kyu Blue Belt
Turning inward, what changes of the self can I observe since starting training? There are many new refrains to my inner monologue inside and outside the dojo: What would a non-quitting spirit look like in this scenario? How might it look to not live in the future? Make space to observe how distance will change your relationship with this sensation. First, control the body. If you're feeling shy, think how the other person may benefit from you speaking up. De-escalate yourself first. It’s not okay, but it’s not a problem. These thoughts have made me kinder and happier, as has having a space outside my home to go where I feel physically and psychologically safe. Finally, thanks to having met some consistency in my training, I feel stronger, more grounded, and back in motion.

Alexandra Mignet - 8th Kyu Blue Belt
In practicing Karate, I found more [than just a workout]. I found a spirit, a strong and respectful community, a way of being stronger, healthier, happier. … This is priceless. Each time I practice, I take a break from my life. Not only because it allows me to listen to my mind and my body but also because it requires concentration and mindfulness. I can only think about karate when I am doing karate.

Peggy Scanlan - 8th Kyu Blue Belt
I chose Thousand Waves as my new dojo because I know the teachers are excellent. I appreciate the “feel” of the dojo, not strict and harsh like other schools, but with more of a foundation in loving kindness. And I immediately felt comfortable cautiously trying some classes and going at a pace that works with my body and current pain situation.

Lisa May Simpson - 8th Kyu Blue Belt
It may seem obvious, but I’m coming to understand on a deeper level that participating in the governance of an organization is not the same as participating in the life of a community. The former allows me to feel (and, I hope, to be) useful, to contribute, to give back in a way that uses my skills. Training, though, demands something different. I have no inherent skills in the art I’m learning. I have only my spirit and my willingness to participate. I have no professional armor, no credentials with which to answer the perpetual question, “do I even deserve to be here?” that repeats in my head wherever I am. The welcome and encouragement I receive invites me to trust that perhaps my willingness and my participation is enough to justify the space I take up on the floor.

Jessica Wynne - 8th Kyu Blue Belt
I struggled with the culture at several [martial arts] places…. After a while, I was just alienated and filled with anxiety when going to training. I took the time I needed to rest and think about what was important to me. Eventually, I ended up trying again, focusing on looking for a woman-owned or woman-centered place that supported self-paced training and wasn’t just focused on selling you on extra services. A place that matched my own values, and that’s when I found Thousand Waves.

“Create a safe and beautiful place for women to explore their physical selves, get stronger, and feel more empowered.” 

THAT’S what I was looking for. I read about Shuseki Shihan Nancy’s crazy dream and, now, after training with her, I know she lives that dream and creates that environment in every class.

Stephanie Mattos - 6th Kyu Yellow Belt
Kumite at Thousand Waves strives - and succeeds - to meet students where they’re at, not just physically, but emotionally too. The instructors aid greatly in decentering negative feelings and removing shame; not removing them completely, but not focusing on them in a healthy way, showing that it isn’t about removing negativity when it arises, but “learning what to do when these things happen” (Adult Study Guide, ch. 18, pg. 101). …

Looking at my past and decoupling violence from my self-worth has taken a long time, and I’ve explored it through theater as well as martial arts. But kumite helped me take it one step further. While I have reached catharsis with forgiving my past self for the things I had to endure to get to my present self, kumite has enabled me to reframe my “first language” of violence into something that I can learn from – not in a way rooted in fear and shame, but as a way to physically, emotionally and mentally affirm to myself that I am capable of growth; that I am allowed to fail before succeeding, and that I will forever be a student of life, and to embrace the lessons that life teaches me.

Christine Confederat - 5th Kyu Advanced Yellow Belt
In self-defense class we often practice getting out of someone’s grasp. Getting one or both of your wrists grabbed, your shirt, your shoulders, even getting pinned to the ground are all things we consistently drill so that we know to not stop fighting even if we feel powerless. However, the most important advice we are given is “don’t get grabbed.” Though that at first seems like silly advice, obviously no one would want to get grabbed, you start to realize how much power you have even before someone makes contact with you…. Something as simple as having a sense of familiarity with your surroundings by knowing exits and the most populated areas could prevent someone from ever laying a hand on you. Even if you notice someone approaching you there are several things that could be done before they even come within arm's length of you. Placing your arms in front of you, raising your voice could be enough for the person to move on. The last thing you want to do is remain compliant, silent and allow them to move you to a secondary location.

I am far from the ideal image of empowerment but I have come so far because of Thousand Waves and Self Defense classes that I know for a fact that I wouldn’t let myself be taken advantage of like I once was. I strive to keep improving in the never-ending cycle of empowerment and being a Karateka.

Xachary Lightner - 1st Kyu Advanced Brown Belt
At Thousand Waves, the rule of thumb is to take care of your training partner. This means checking in with each person you practice with and adjusting to meet them for exercise that is mutually beneficial. Each partner has to know their own ability and limitations, and state those clearly and honestly. With this standard in place, we can preserve our friend’s long-term health and encourage their learning and growth in a safe way. This doesn’t happen when one or both sides unleash everything they have in an uncontrolled, egoistic way.