A Bridge Between Lives

from the September, 2011 issue of Kiai!

A Bridge between Lives

By Sam Boyer, Shodan
with introduction by Kyoshi Sarah Ludden

What delights me most about Camp Kokoro is that very young people take over the dojo for four weeks: children and young adults come together to create friendships, deepen karate discipline and enjoy the outdoors. The campers are ages 6 to 13 and the counselors are 14 to 21!

Senpai Sam Boyer began training with us as a young child and grew up at Thousand Waves. He is now a senior at Drake University and worked this summer as a teacher and counselor at Camp Kokoro. He discovered an unexpected gift which he describes below.

By Sam Boyer
Shodan

I have always been a bit cynical when organizations toss around the words “community” and “family”. The best scenario I know for any organization is to bind members into a cohesive, supportive whole, and no word seems to encompass that concept better than “community”. Rarely does an organization actually create a “community”; a loose confederation of people with common interests is usually the best an organization can realistically hope for.

Thousand Waves, however, does an excellent job of creating a legitimate community of martial arts students; new comers are warmly greeted, absent members are welcomed with sincere pleasure and open arms, and long-time regulars and dojo leaders are always recognized and acknowledged. I have always been proud to be a part of a true, functioning community, one that assists its members and takes real interest in both their karate studies and their lives outside the dojo.

Yet while the community and leadership of Thousand Waves recognizes its members as more than martial arts students, sometimes it is difficult for the members to see each other as more than training partners. I have many training partners at Thousand Waves, but few friends; beyond the walls of our dojo I have seen training partners dispersing into separate cars, separate buses and trains, moving in every direction but each-others. I never felt lonely at Thousand Waves, but it always saddened me to see others, and myself, happily train and sweat together but never consider forming a relationship beyond the dojo.

Imagine my surprise and delight then when, working at Camp Kokoro this summer, I was invited to join my fellow counselors and teachers for ice cream after work. Or was told about a co-workers weekend beyond “I didn’t do much” or “It was pretty crazy”. Or was filled in on every detail of last night’s birthday party by a young student.

Camp Kokoro is perhaps the quirkiest event in our dojo’s calendar. For a full month fifty pairs of shoes trod across the dojo floor, cracker crumbs can be found in the locker rooms, the sounds of instruction and kiai are replaced by excited chatter and children’s laughter. Yet I think it is because Camp Kokoro is so different from business-as-usual at the dojo that those who work at the camp get to see their fellow karate-ka as more than training partners, but instead as full human beings.

Every hour of the day (save when teaching) is filled with snatches of conversation, and that conversation is not always about karate. It is about friends, events, relationships, and everyday life. It is wholly mundane conversation that is in fact anything but mundane in our community. It is the stories of people’s lives.

Thousand Waves is a great community, and a place that for me is “like church”. It is a place students can go to put everyday troubles aside, and focus on an ancient and beautiful art that creates mental peace and physical strength. At the beginning of class the students meditate, and the instructor will remind the students to “stop thinking about the day that passed, or what you have to do later. Focus on the moment, and be grateful for this time to train.” And of course we do; karate takes great concentration. But we can fail to make connections with our fellow students that are not related to karate, because at the dojo, we are trained to focus on nothing but karate. Who can remember to tell someone about their boss’ bad temper when for an hour all they did was practice kata and kumite?

At Camp Kokoro, students and counselors get the best of both worlds. It is the one time and place at our dojo (aside from the self-defense workshops) that mundane life and karate practice are melded into one. Kids are not only practicing Pinan katas but are also playing kickball. Counselors are not just sparring together but also coordinating trips to the beach. I learned more about my fellow counselors in a month than I learned in thirteen years of training with them.

Camp Kokoro is a place where the karate kids can simply be kids together, learning how to share, socialize, and play well with each-other. For the counselors, it is an opportunity to see past the veil of being fellow karate-ka and start being fellow human beings. It strengthens not just our children’s karate but also our children’s bonds with one-another, and likewise it transforms fellow teenage and young adult karate students into everyday friends.

As I get ready for my last year of undergraduate school, I know that I will probably not be able to work at Camp Kokoro again. But I look forward to the thought of other counselors, younger than myself, bonding with one-another and discovering what I did about Camp Kokoro and our dojo. It will do more than develop your karate training—it will help you become friends with your training partners. Camp Kokoro is advancing our community beyond the walls of our dojo, and out into the world at large.